Day 24: Cabisbunda y meditabaja, or just blue #SOL2021 #SOLSC

Today I woke up blue, or after writing an 11 pages handwritten letter to my daughter for her coming birthday made me blue. I wonder where such a cliché of time went to. I wonder if I have been taking advantage of my life thoroughly. Thinking of my daughter always makes me nostalgic. Probably the ineluctable pass of time. The second law of thermodynamic applied to the fullest. Nothing can return where it started.

In theory all is good; I am so proud of her and her accomplishments. I should be proud of being her mama, and I am, because of her, not me. I miss her at the same time I miss my mom. I think the hormones are doing part of the trick again.

Even though I told my daughter that the letter was just for her, I took photos of each page, just in case it’s lost in the mail. It felt too fragile to send it with the possibility of disappearing with one mishap of the postal service, when I spent the whole morning writing it.

And here I am toying with the idea to publish it in thumbnails. But I won’t, even when I can’t help to tell the world how much I love you, Matilde.

Day 24. The unsent letter #SOL2020 Challenge #SOLSC


Today, March 24th, 2020, I’m participating in Two Writing Teachers’ Slice of Life Story Challenge.



I just found a letter I meant to send to my sister-in-law for her daughter, Kathryn, who was attending a retreat in November 2017. I don´t know why I never sent it to her. I think I felt embarrassed. I was living in Spain, and I was not pivotal in her life. I am still not.

Nonetheless, today I want to make it public. I find the letter somehow more relevant now than three years ago. I am searching for answers myself, and to certain degree, I want to connect to her through the world of writing.

Dear Kathryn,

I was uploading a bunch of old photos this week, and came across of several of you, when we spent time together in either Oregon or Seattle. It was almost 10 years ago! Now, when I think about the young adult woman I met last summer, I am totally amazed and impressed. Or maybe I shouldn’t. You come from two amazing parents who have helped you to be funny, caring, strong, witty, resilient, and best of all, a good person. I am very happy for you, and your confirmation goals. Feeding the soul is as important as feeding your body. I really admire people that have strong faith and are consistent with their projects and values. Sometimes it’s not easy. You receive a lot of pressure from everybody, and the most difficult ones are from the people you love or care. Stay strong, keep up with your dreams (I like to call them projects, otherwise they stay in that unreachable realm of dreams), and always feed your spirit. You are a young and busy person, but it’s always important to find the time to get out of the roller coaster, and recollect, think, meditate, pray. It doesn’t matter how old or young you are, that’s something as important as your studies, your future professional career, your job.

Dear Kathryn, I will be thinking of you when you open this humble letter that your momma will put among other more important things.

Kathryn and J.J.
Kathryn with our late dog J.J.

Kathryn and Mati
Kathryn with my daughter Matilde in 2006